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The war between the house of Saul and the house of David lasted a long time; and David grew stronger and stronger, while the house of Saul grew weaker and weaker.
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Sons were born to David in Hebron. His firstborn was Amnon, by Ahinoam the Jezreelitess;
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his second was Kileab, by Abigail, the widow of Nabal the Carmelite; the third was Absalom, the son of Maacah, daughter of Talmai king of Geshur;
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the fourth was Adonijah, the son of Haggith; the fifth was Shephatiah, the son of Abital;
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and the sixth was Ithream, by Eglah, David’s wife. These were born to David in Hebron.
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While there was war between the house of Saul and the house of David, Abner was gaining influence in the house of Saul.
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Now Saul had a concubine named Rizpah; she was the daughter of Aiah. And Ish-bosheth said to Abner, “Why have you gone in to my father’s concubine?”
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Then Abner was very angry because of the words of Ish-bosheth, and he said, “Am I a dog’s head from Judah? To this day I have shown loyalty to the house of Saul your father, to his brothers, and to his friends, and I have not delivered you into the hand of David; yet now you charge me with wrongdoing concerning a woman?
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May God do so to Abner, and more also, if I do not do for David as the LORD has sworn to him,
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to transfer the kingdom from the house of Saul and to establish the throne of David over Israel and over Judah, from Dan to Beersheba.”
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And Ish-bosheth could no longer answer Abner a word, because he feared him.
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Then Abner sent messengers to David, saying, “To whom does the land belong? Make your covenant with me, and behold, I will help you bring all Israel over to you.”
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David answered, “Good; I will make a covenant with you. But one thing I ask of you: you shall not come into my presence unless you first bring Michal, Saul’s daughter, when you come to see me.”
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David also sent messengers to Ish-bosheth, Saul’s son, saying, “Give me my wife Michal, whom I obtained for a hundred Philistine foreskins.”
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So Ish-bosheth sent and took her from her husband, Paltiel the son of Laish.
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And her husband went with her, weeping as he followed her all the way to Bahurim. Then Abner said to him, “Go, return.” So he returned.
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Meanwhile Abner had been speaking with the elders of Israel, saying, “For some time you have wanted David to be king over you.
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So now act, for the LORD has spoken concerning David, saying, ‘By the hand of My servant David I will save My people Israel from the hand of the Philistines and from the hand of all their enemies.’”
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Abner also spoke with the Benjamites; and Abner went to speak with David in Hebron all that seemed good to Israel and to the whole house of Benjamin.
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When Abner came to David in Hebron with twenty men, David made a feast for Abner and for the men who were with him.
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Abner said to David, “Let me arise and go, and I will gather all Israel to my lord the king, so that they may make a covenant with you, and you may reign over all that your heart desires.” Then David sent Abner away, and he went in peace.
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Just then the servants of David and Joab came from a raid, and they brought back much spoil. But Abner was no longer with David in Hebron, for he had sent him away, and he had gone in peace.
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When Joab and all his army had come, it was told Joab, saying, “Abner son of Ner came to the king, and he has sent him away, and he has gone in peace.”
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Then Joab went to the king and said, “What have you done? Abner came to you; why did you let him go away?
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Do you not know Abner son of Ner? He came to deceive you and to know your going out and your coming in, and to know all that you are doing.”
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After this Joab left David and sent messengers after Abner, and they brought him back from the cistern of Sirah, without David’s knowledge.
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When Abner returned to Hebron, Joab took him aside in the gateway, as though to speak with him privately; and there he struck him in the stomach, so that he died, in revenge for the blood of his brother Asahel.
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When David heard of it afterward, he said, “I and my kingdom are forever guiltless before the LORD concerning the blood of Abner son of Ner.
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May it fall upon the head of Joab and upon all his father’s house. May there never fail from the house of Joab one who has a discharge, or who is leprous, or who leans on a staff, or who falls by the sword, or who lacks bread.”
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So Joab and Abishai his brother killed Abner, because he had killed their brother Asahel at Gibeon in the battle.
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Then David said to Joab and to all the people who were with him, “Tear your clothes, and put on sackcloth, and mourn before Abner’s body.” And King David himself walked behind the bier.
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When they buried Abner in Hebron, the king lifted up his voice and wept at Abner’s grave, and all the people wept.
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And the king sang this lament for Abner:
“Should Abner die as a fool dies?
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Your hands were not bound, and your feet were not put in chains.
You fell as one falls before wicked men.”
And all the people wept even more for him.
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Then all the people came to urge David to eat bread while it was still day, but David swore, saying, “May God punish me, and more also, if before the sun goes down I taste bread or anything else.”
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When all the people saw it, it pleased them, just as everything the king did pleased all the people.
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So all the people and all Israel understood that day that the killing of Abner son of Ner was not the king’s doing.
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Then the king said to his servants, “Do you not know that a prince and a great man has fallen this day in Israel?
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But I am still weak today, though anointed king; and these men, the sons of Zeruiah, are too strong for me. May the LORD repay the evildoer according to his evil.”
🕊️⚔️🕯️ Summary of 2 Samuel 3 – The Cold War Ends, Hot Politics Begin
2 Samuel 3 continues the story of the conflict between the house of David and the house of Saul, but this chapter brings a major shift. David grows stronger, while the house of Saul grows weaker, especially after Abner, Saul’s commander, turns his loyalty to David. But just when peace seems near, Joab kills Abner out of revenge, and David must clear his name from blood he did not shed. This is an important chapter that reveals politics, betrayal, and the integrity of a true king.
📌 1. David Grows Stronger, Saul Weakens (verses 1–5)
➡️ There was a long war between the house of Saul and David
➡️ David grew stronger, Saul grew weaker
➡️ In Hebron, David had 6 wives and children from each wife
🎯 Growth in power may be visible on the outside, but God judges the heart and faithfulness.
📌 2. Abner Quarrels with Ish-bosheth and Defects (verses 6–11)
➡️ Ish-bosheth accused Abner of lying with his father Saul’s concubine
➡️ Abner was offended and decided to hand over all Israel to David
🎯 Accusations and distrust can break an important alliance.
📌 3. Abner Offers an Alliance with David (verses 12–21)
➡️ Abner sent messengers to David and said:
“Whose hand is stronger than David’s hand?”
➡️ David asked for Michal, Saul’s daughter, as the condition of the alliance
➡️ Abner spoke to the elders of Israel, and they agreed to receive David
➡️ Abner came himself to Hebron and was warmly received by David
🎯 David opened his hand for national reconciliation, even from a former enemy.
📌 4. Joab Kills Abner in Revenge (verses 22–30)
➡️ Joab was angry when he learned that Abner had come and gone in peace
➡️ He felt that David had been deceived, and secretly killed Abner
➡️ But in fact, Joab was avenging the death of his brother Asahel
🎯 Personal revenge can destroy the momentum of peace that God is building.
📌 5. David Mourns for Abner and Clears His Name (verses 31–39)
➡️ David mourned publicly for Abner
➡️ He would not eat, declaring himself innocent of Abner’s blood
➡️ All the people saw that David was innocent of Abner’s death
🎯 A spiritual leader must not only be right, but must also appear right before the people.
📖 Main Teaching
- True strength is not only military power, but the ability to build peaceful alliances
- Careless accusations can destroy trust
- One who turns away from an enemy can become an instrument of reconciliation when received with a right heart
- Personal revenge destroys God’s greater plan
- A leader’s integrity is tested not only in war, but also in internal conflict
✨ Spiritual Meaning (New Testament)
“Do not seek revenge yourselves… vengeance belongs to Me, says the Lord.”
➡️ Joab failed to obey this principle, but David modeled forgiveness and patience.
“Blessed are the peacemakers…”
➡️ David sought to unite the nation, not stir up conflict.
“Pursue peace with all people…”
➡️ David welcomed Abner for the sake of national peace.
“Live in a good way among the unbelievers…”
➡️ David maintained his spiritual witness before Israel when Joab killed Abner.
🕊️ “David grew stronger and stronger, but the house of Saul grew weaker and weaker.” – 2 Samuel 3:1
🕊️ “Do I not know… that a prince and a great man has fallen this day?” – 2 Samuel 3:38
🕊️ “I and my kingdom are guiltless concerning the blood of Abner…” – 2 Samuel 3:28
🕊️ “May the LORD repay the evildoer according to his evil.” – 2 Samuel 3:39
