Many young Christians face this struggle: “I believe in Jesus, but my parents do not. Do I still have to submit to them?” Sometimes this appears in a mild form, such as differing views about church. But in other cases, it can become very heavy, such as being forbidden to join fellowship, restricted from ministry, or even being asked to leave the faith.
So, what is the biblical response? Should a Christian child still submit if their parents are unbelievers and reject the child’s faith?
1. The Command to Honor Parents Still Applies
One of the earliest and clearest commands in the Bible is: “Honor your father and your mother” (Exodus 20:12). Even in the New Testament, Paul repeats this in Ephesians 6:1-2, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”
Honoring parents is part of the life of a believer, regardless of their faith background. However, notice the important phrase in Ephesians: “in the Lord.” Our obedience to our parents still remains under the authority of our obedience to God.
2. Submission Does Not Mean Following in Sin or Rejecting the Faith
If parents ask for something that clearly goes against the faith or the Word of God, then we must choose to obey God.
In Acts 5:29, Peter said firmly, “We must obey God rather than men.” This is not a call to rebellion, but a healthy and right priority of obedience.
For example:
- If parents forbid prayer or going to church, we may seek wise and loving ways to keep doing so.
- If parents tell us to lie, be corrupt, or do something that goes against Christian values, we must refuse respectfully but firmly.
Submission does not mean sacrificing faith. But faith is also not an excuse to rebel without love.
3. God Can Use Your Respectful Attitude as a Witness
Many unbelieving parents eventually become open to the gospel not because of arguments, but because they see their child’s loving and respectful attitude.
1 Peter 3:1 gives a very beautiful principle in the context of a relationship with an unbelieving spouse, but it can also be applied in the family: “…that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives.”
Attitude, not arguments, is often what touches the deepest part of the heart. So when you act respectfully, patiently, and continue to show the love of Christ, God can use your life to touch your parents’ hearts.
4. God Knows Your Pain and Pressure
It is not easy to live in a home that does not support your faith. At times you may feel alone, misunderstood, or even blamed for choosing Jesus. But remember, Jesus Himself experienced rejection from those closest to Him.
Mark 3:21 records that Jesus’ own family thought He was “out of His mind.” Yet Jesus still walked in the Father’s will, without hating or insulting His family.
God understands your pressure, and He will sustain you. He will give you the wisdom, courage, and comfort you need.
5. Rely on the Holy Spirit to Set Wise Boundaries
There are times when you need to set boundaries: for example, in dating, ministry calling, or important life decisions. If parents force their will in a way that conflicts with faith, ask for the guidance of the Holy Spirit to respond with wisdom.
A harsh attitude, answering back emotionally, or deliberately distancing yourself from them without reason, will only make our witness look bad. But a gentle attitude rooted in the Word will show who the God is that you worship.
Conclusion: Honor Without Compromise, Love Without Surrendering the Faith
So, should you submit to unbelieving parents? The answer is: yes, as long as it does not conflict with God’s will.
Submission does not mean giving in to spiritual pressure, but showing mature love and respect. And if one day you must choose between your parents’ will and obedience to God, obey God with respect, not with rebellion.
Growing faith is seen not only in church, but in the home, where love is tested and the light of Christ shines most clearly.
